Pages

Saturday, February 26, 2005

HASTE

PAGOD AKO NGYN...

ANYWAYZ,
MAY NAG-K-CARE BA...

DBA,
IT'Z UPLIFTING 2 HAV SUM1
HU'D MAKE U FEEL LOVED & COMFORTED...

WELL..,
SUMHOW..,
IM USED 2 "IT"...

'LAM NYO NA:
"FEELIN' BAD YET NO1 SEEMZ 2 NOTICE IT"...

SIGH>

PERO 2 ADMIT 2 U, GUYZ:
I HATE "IT"...

SOB>

SANA NAG-IISA LANG AKONG GAN'TO...

I KNOW KC HOW IT FEELS...
& IT'D REALLY GIV ONE A HARD TIME LIVING...

SANA...

I AINT PERFECT



IM NOT PERFECT...
& OFTEN,
I DO HATE MYSELF FOR BEIN' SO...

I KNOW YOU CANT ACCEPT IT...
I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL,
FOR I, MYSELF,CANT ACCEPT SUCH STUPIDITY AS WELL.

BUT THERE'Z NOTHIN' YOU CAN DO..,
'COZ EVEN I DONT WANNA DO SOMETHIN' 'BOUT IT..

SO ALLOW ME TO ENJOY DOIN' THINGZ, W/C GLADDEN ME...
FOR REAL SMILES SELDOMLY VISIT MY FACE...

THOUGH I KNOW SUCH THINGZ
-- CRAZY THINGZ, I SHOULD SAY --
ANNOY YOU BADLY...

I'M NOT PERFECT, REMEMBER..?

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

I WANT TO KNOW>>

The Invitation
by Oriah Mountain Dreamer

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain!
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!"

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

JUZ READ THIZ FROM ANOTHER BLOGGER>>

& THIS DID MOVE ME...
-- I MEAN, IT ALWAYZ DOES>>

WHY DO I FEEL SAD..?

I HAV NO IDEA OF HOW THIS DUMP FEELIN STARTED...

ALL I KNOW IS THAT, I LOVED...

I THOT LOVE WUD MAKE MY WORLD A COLORFUL ONE...
YET, WHUT HAPPEND IS THE OTHER WAY 'ROUND...

D SUN DOESNT RISE ANYMORE...

NO MORE FANCY ARCH AFTER EACH RAIN...

I WANA BE ALIVE AGAIN...

CHEER ME UP...

WHOAH..!

AMIDST THE CROWD...

I STAND ALONE...

WITH NO ONE TO SHARE MY PROBZ
& INTERESTZ WITH...

I DO FEEL SAD...

EXHAUSTED...

DO I DESERVE SUCH CRITICISMZ...?

SUCH SOUL-SQUEEZING TRIALZ..?

LET ME REST...
EVEN ONLY FOR A SECOND...

PLEASE...

THREE SIDES OF ME

THREE SIDEZ OF ME



MY PAST...

IT DOES HAUNT ME NIGHT AND DAY.
THE TWILIGHT BOREALIS GETTIN' DIMMER & DIMMER
THE DIZZINESS CAUSED BY MONSTERZ SCREAMIN' MY NAME
INCULCATING REGRET, GUILT,
TO MY DREARY SOUL.


MY PRESENT...

WITH A PURPLE SKY COVERING MY WORLD.
HOW CAN I ESCAPE THIS RAMPANT CHAOS.
HELP ME SEE & HEAR MYSELF.

AHEAD OF ME IS A WHIRLWIND.
MARRING EVERY CREATURE IT MEETS.
BESIDE ME: A ROAD SO STEEP...
AND AN OLD, HOLLOW TREE...

AND BEHIND ME LIES A FOGGY GRAVE...

HOW CAN I SURVIVE IF AROUND ME ARE DIMENSIONS
THAT WHISPER TO ME THE WORDS
"FEAR"   "SHAME"  AND "DEATH"?

THEY SURELY GOT ME IMMOBILIZED.
THIS IS MY "NOW", ALL THAT IS LEFT OF YESTERDAY.

MY FUTURE...
DEEP. UNCLEAR. MY DESTRUCTION.

I DO LOOK FORWARD TO THAT
WITH FRIGHT. 
AND EXCITEMENT.

BECAUSE SOMEHOW... I KNOW...
I'M GONNA FIND PEACE.